Sunday, May 23, 2010

Regarding Lingerie


It is a truth universally acknowledged that a single woman with or without a great fortune has no use for lingerie whatsoever in her life...

Shopping for decent underwear is a thing which requires skill, precision, determination & an ability to choose, to make the wisest decision when you are bombarded with lethal (underwired) choices.

Shopping for my undies has been a painful experience for me, always. Since my 15th birthday, I have been shopping for my underwear on my own. Till then, it used to be a family affair, when 3 times a year, we were bought matching sets of bloomers. It was really hassle-free. In my teens, my Mum bought me sporty bras that made sure that my non-existent cleavage remained inconspicuous.

I remember a particularly painful experience, when I was living in Bangalore and my friend and colleague Rits recommended me a particular lingerie store. The owner/attendant was a middle aged woman, rather like a sweet auntie. That's what I thought first. Then she asked me, "What is your size, baby?" I told her, to which she replied, totally checking me out, "No, no baby, you'll want a B, not a C!" I blushed and asked for some everyday-wear bras, you know, the comfy affairs, which any self-respecting girl would rather die, than show it to her boyfriend. She thrust a brown silk & lace piece with underwire & padding under my nose. "Just try this one, baby...it'll look so good on you" she said checking me out again. I thought I'll find Rits and make her pay for this. She shoved me into a dressing room & started throwing more lace & wire from the top of the door, yelling all the time, "try this one baby...and this...and this will look so good with your skin colour!" Finally & firmly I got through her. I said, "I really like these auntie, but I'd like to see some cotton ones too, please." She shook her head sadly saying, "but baby, you're so young! These horrid cotton affairs are meant for menopausal women!" That was when I dropped everything and fled.

I now take care that whenever I shop for underclothes, I always pick small stores, that carry no labels. Huh. Life has taught me much.

I was moaning about this to my Bua (my father's sister), Aunt Uma, when she said, "come, I'll show you the perfect shop!" My Aunt U is a black belt shopper. Her bargaining skills are unsurpassed & she knows exactly where the sales are. I'm sure she has a network of something like Baker Street Irregulars, who provide her with the names and addresses of the shopkeepers who are malleable. So she took me with her, in one of the city's most crowded areas. We went through familiar shopping streets, bustling with people, to the slightly unknown areas of the place. We went inside a nondescript building & rode in a elevator, which could very well have been the First Elevator In India.

You know, there is a moment in your life, when everything feels right and the second you meet someone, you know that he/she is the right one for you. You feel that no one else can understand you like him. You just look at him, and you know, everything is gonna be alright.
This is what I felt when I first saw "New Ladies Paradise - Wholesale woman's underwears & bra". What's in a name, I ask like Mr. Shakespeare. There were no vulgar "2-piece" or "4-piece" (?) clothes hanging out, no photographs of busty women showcasing impossible bras. Just a shop, a regular shop with mind-boggling rows and rows of neatly labeled boxes. The shop owner too, was a fatherly looking old man, with a paunch & a benevolent smile.

He tirelessly showed me the things that I wanted to see, gave me a fat discount and bid me adieu. This is what a shopping experience should be like. He has gained a customer for life. God bless you man!
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Monday, May 17, 2010

Rant, Rant, Rant


There's this strange but true phenomenon about me. I can only be creative late at night. Like now, for example. Its 9:14 pm, a perfectly reasonable time for a person to have had his/her dinner, watched some TV, decided against coffee and turn on the computer in expectation of squeezing some creative juices. But does the creativity juice flow? Nooooo. Not for me at least. It must be the magical combination of heavy eyelids, yawning mouth & scrubbed face. Grrr.

So considering that I'm in a 'rant' mode, let me tell you about my interview.
Today I had a Group Discussion & Personal Interview (GD/PI for short) session for my MBA entrance exam. Since Dad & I have decided that unless I get a 'A' list college from Bombay, I won't be going for it. I mean, what the use, right? I'll just be wasting two more years on a mediocre degree & will get a mediocre job. It'll be much better to get married, go some place nice and then enroll in a good college. So, anyway, I was there, 10 minutes early, neatly dressed in a Salwaar-Kameez & completely stress-free.

I had a little trouble in finding the exact building in the Pune University campus (I mean, the place is huge! Must be at least 20 kilometers in radius). After I parked my car, I went there and was made to sit in a classroom and fill out a form. It contained questions like, "What are your strengths and weaknesses?", "Which one of your family you'd save first in case of a fire?" and "What is the biggest mistake of your life?". So I spent my 30 minutes in answering these questions, keeping them as far from reality as I could. Later, we were given a serial number (I was no. 11) and made to sit in a semi-circle. Our topic for the GD was "Is Common Sense more important to running a business that Genius?". I did my thing.

Later came the PI. There were two guys who were interviewing me. They were trying the good ol' 'Good Cop, Bad Cop' routine. But after a couple of minutes due to my charming manners, both of them turned into 'Good Cops'!

Well, lets see how it turns out... I mean, either way I win, right? Anyhoo, I've got another one of the GD/PIs on the 28th. Will have to miss out on one of the south Indian summer weddings. Anyway, the heat at this time of year in the south is simply unbearable! Phew! God luck, Mum, she's going, by the way.
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